Podcast #21 Wake Up to YOU

What does it mean to be “woken”? What does it mean for your life to be disrupted by whiteness and white supremacy? You get to find out in today's episode with my guest, SharRon Jamison.

SharRon supports women to be who they were born to be. She teaches that we don't have to settle for what society has taught and told us to be.

SharRon is sharing with us today why she is so passionate about educating and teaching people what it means to be a woman of color in today’s world. Her world was always disrupted by whiteness and white supremacy, but shares how women of color are naturally resilient because of it. We don’t have a choice when the world is set up for whiteness and men.

But it is getting to where we are tired - tired of navigating through a dominant culture that is slowly waking up to the thoughts and beliefs that have infected and affected society for so long. And now we are not only are we a forced to navigate in this conundrum, but now we are being called to educate others about what it means to be a different society.

What does it mean when you are a person of color and you are a woman, or you are other? What does that mean? SharRon does a lot of education work, or education/emotional labor trying to educate those who don’t already know what we’ve been going through. It’s enraging for her to hear that people are not aware. SharRon shares how she uses a lot of energy to quiet her rage, and not demean people, because doing that would not allow a bridge to be built. 

She feels a commitment to try and educate people because if she doesn’t do it, and lets them and let the dominant culture just hear and read about stories, when she can be there and tell them about lived experiences, and make it real for them. So she normalizes these experiences and life, and puts a human face on the information they are reading about in books.

Through SharRon’s experiences she knows that racism is not only psychologically violent but physically violent as well. And even though laws have changed, it doesn’t create love. You can legislate laws, but you can’t legislate love. You can’t legislate respect and dignity.

We talk about what it means for women, white women, and women of color who voted for Trump. The impact that has and will have on not only you but your daughters as well. We need to think of what kind of person we are voting for, and what he represents for the kind of life we want for our daughters, granddaughters, and grandsons.

I hope this episode resonate and inspires you. Let’s continue to move past the status quo, and speak up for your humanity, and others humanity.

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Join her Facebook Group here: Dare to Soar Higher with SharRon Jamison

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• Episode #20: How to Be the Queen of Your Own Life

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*Note- The Brand Disruptors Podcast is produced for the ear and made to be heard not read. We strongly encourage you to listen to the audio which includes emotion and emphasis that's not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers and may contain errors. Please check the corresponding audio before quoting it in print.

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to this edition of brand disruptors. I'm here with my friend Sharon Jamison. Shiran tell us what you've been up to.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
Well, first, thanks so much. I'm really excited to see you then up to many things to support women, to be who they were born to be. And so we don't have to settle for what society has taught and told us to be, and really busy, because I think COVID has had a way of waking all of us up and people are realizing that they were not as happy as they thought. So now I've been really working with a women, trying to help them restructure their life in a way that feels in alignment. So it's been really busy. And you think that COVID is slowing down, but it's slowing people down, but it's opening them up to new awareness and a new journey to be themselves.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Oh my God. I love that. I think that new and I do like some of our work kind of overlaps, we do some of the same things and I think just in different ways. And one of the things that I noticed this year was that I too have been way busier than ever, which I'm grateful for. Right. I'm grateful for the business. And I, I see a lot of us, especially women of color, we're just, we're, we're tired. Right? And I think you and I, we talked about this a little bit before we jumped on this call, let's talk about this resiliency that we're we're naturally born with. Right. But then we had to take it to a whole other level this year.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
Oh my God, you have a mouth for I think we, as women of color, like you said, are naturally resilient. We don't have a choice it's called survival, especially when the world is set up, you know, in whiteness and maleness. So to be a woman of color and to be othered in a society there's already stressful to, to navigate in those settings and organizations in a corporate space, sometimes in our families that maybe are holding onto old traditions that are really not our truth. But I felt like it was a different type of weariness as the road. The dominant culture is waking up to racism and white supremacy and privilege and how those, those thoughts and beliefs have effected and affected society. But the challenges as women of color, people of color, we already knew that we already had those experiences.

Speaker 2 (02:44):
So people are waking up, b hat it means to be different a society. What it, what does it mean when you are a person of color and you are a woman or you are other, what does that mean? So I find myself having to do a lot of education, which I call emotional labor in ways that I didn't have to do that work that I'm happy about it, but it's also challenging. And sometimes I get angry because, because I'm thinking, how did you not know? We lived through Rodney King. We, we lived through the New York six, those kids in New York, we have lived through so much that sometimes when people say I wasn't aware, a lot of my energy is too quiet in my rage so that I can educate them in a way that's not demeaning. I don't want to shame people. I don't want to demean people because that does not allow us to build a bridge, but Nia is taxing to try to, to keep myself in some emotional space, but provide some empathy and love and compassion to others, which was denied me. So that's very, very heavy.

Speaker 1 (04:10):
It is heavy. And let me ask you, like, I've, I have a lot of friends in my community and some of them just flat out say, it's not their responsibility. Right? So as an African-American woman, it's not my responsibility to teach privileged people what it means to be privileged nor, you know, go through the education that you just kind of talked about. Right. So tell me, like personally, why do you feel like it's your responsibility and why do you do it? Like I'm curious.

Speaker 2 (04:41):
Yeah. Good question first. I don't think it's my responsibility. But I also know I can play a role and the part of me that's the minister to me, racism is psychological violence. It gets the spirit and the soul. So that part of me that's that understands that we have to heal the heart to change the head. I feel a commitment to try because if I don't do it and let them and let the dominant culture hear stories, not just read about stories, but hear about lived experiences. I think it will take longer to build a bridge. So what I try to do is normalize and put a human face on the information that you read in the books. Now, I don't do it all the time. I have to make sure that I'm in a good space because I don't want to do that emotional labor.

Speaker 2 (05:34):
But to me, as, as a holistic coach, as a minister, as a mom, as a person who is always the only black person in many types of white dominant settings, I have to put my own survival so that I can make people more aware of the microaggressions since I'm in room. And then I'm not only thinking about me, I'm in my mid fifties, my career is coming to a different place, but there's a women behind me behind me that if I can speak for them in riding the dollar a little bit, but giving people a better understanding, not of, not of theory, but of how that shows up when they put my black son over, because he driving a new car, how that shows up when they, when my son can get a job, his name is Tarik Abdul hop. And we changed his resume to, to T R Jameson.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
I have to share those stories because if not, they can say that. I just read about that. No, I'm at the dinner table with you. And I try to humanize the stories. So it's not my role is I don't feel like it's my responsibility, but it's something that I feel compelled to do. What I feel like doing it. Sometimes I don't, but that's why I feel it's, it's something that I want to do out of my spiritual understanding as to my understanding as to my God. So it was really a God thing. I don't sometimes I I'm not really.

Speaker 1 (07:09):
You were real, right? So, but you've been doing this work way before it was quote unquote invoke, right? I think a lot of people are jumping on this bandwagon that had not even been on the bandwagon, but you've been doing this work for longer than that. Tell me, besides your son, what was the thing that compelled you to get into it? Was this one of your disruptions in life?

Speaker 2 (07:35):
Oh, what a good question. My life was always disrupted by whiteness and white supremacy. For example, in kindergarten, first grade, we integrated the school. And so I moved too quickly. And my teacher that I was attacking her and took a chair and hit me in the head. So, so that was one where the second grade among a lot of kids jumped on me when I was on a playground and knocked me off the monkey bars. And I had a concussion. The third grade kids don't be down the steps. They cracked my skull wide open. So I know that racism is not only psychologically violent, physically violent. So I always knew I would do this work. My father also did this work. Father's a minister. He did this, his, his organization was called project equality. And then he had another organization in Phoenix, Arizona called BCD black community development.

Speaker 2 (08:33):
So I grew up doing this work as a child. And then I, as I got older, after I graduated from college, I did some diversity initiatives, a work equity work with Johnson and Johnson. Well, this is what I see. That's a very different, I see that people are jumping on the bandwagon without good tools, without understanding that you can be angry, but anger does not promote. Understanding is just to think about you and I, we used to get a whipping. Did we learn? We learn when people sat down with us and help us understand, let me tell you why this is going to hurt. You find that right now, people are angry and I was angry too. But I think age has a way of giving you the wisdom and the vocabulary to, to map down those barriers in a way that you allow people to maintain their dignity, even when they don't know how to maintain yours.

Speaker 2 (09:34):
So I understand that we all have been swimming in it's toxic water. My goal is not to let the water swim in me, really try my best to, to provide that support, provide that our reality to help them pressure test with their learning, but do it in a way that they can say face. There's a saying that if you say something and it lands in somebody else's space, you will have to face it again. And again and again. And I see that some people are angry doing this work, and this is not the type of work that you do in anger, because remember it is a action of the heart. Give you an example, Mia. It didn't matter that they changed the laws and said, said that you guys can integrate. Absolutely. But I ever, you can magistrate last, but you cannot legislate love. You cannot legislate respect and dignity. Those are things you have to handle in a different way. Yes. Chase the law. So at least people have some standard that they have to abide by, and then you have to do the other work. It's always the head and heart work at all times when you're doing diversity inclusion equity. And I also think justice work. I add the J because if there's no justice, there's no equity. So those are the things that I believe are important to do.

Speaker 1 (11:04):
And so as a solution to the problem, right, as, as, cause we, we both know that you're a disruptor, like you're not going S I mean, you had disruptions, right? Like major trauma as a child happened to you today, we call it bullying. Right. But that's what happening to people of color for many. And for you, like, what is, what is the solution and what do you, what do you feel like not really what your part is, but what is the part of the collective?

Speaker 2 (11:36):
What a great question. The part of the collective is multilayer because racism is an emotional, spiritual, political, economical foundational financial, religious impact is structural. Systemic is in our beliefs, is in our systems is in our laws. But a couple of things, one has to be education. We have to tell the truth about the history of America, not the sanitized diluted whitewash history that you and I had to learn that we didn't learn history. We learn why we learn Mala by so long us to sleep so that we will not challenge. So we have to, we have to tell the truth. We have to start challenging those traditions that keep people imprisoned in ignorance. We have to challenge the traditions. Third thing. We have to educate our own communities. I'm fine. As I do this work, I do this work with white people.

Speaker 2 (12:37):
I do this work for black people. A lot of black people are people of color, have a lot of internalized racism, a lot of colonization, a lot of dehumanization. They have taken on those negative messages that we learn from the dominant culture. And they apply to those selves into their own communities. So we're walking around a people who have a lot of self hatred. So that's hard to encourage people and inspire people to take action in their communities, to build their own businesses, to support their own families, to love each other. When I've been taught that anybody who looks like me is bad. It's evil, it's unworthy. So we have two things happening. Absolutely. Yeah. Remember that? Why is this white supremacy? That's how they experience it. People of color. Cause remember racism, colorism, my cousins, they experienced this colonization. I want to be as wide as I can. Colorization would be like the settlers. We would have been slaves, the black people, colonization, supremacy, enslavement. They originate from the same place, but they require different tools to heal and to address.

Speaker 1 (13:52):
Yeah. And I'm glad that you mentioned colorism because I was willing to talk about that. I belong to an organization and we were having conversations about black lives matter. And it's a, it's a global organization and they thought, Oh, that's a problem in America. It's political. We don't do politics, et cetera. Right. So I was like, I disagree guys. Like, this is a problem. That's, that's universal. And I want to talk about it and we need to be talking about it in this framework because of the industry that this organization is in. So tell me, like, what do you, how do you see this being right? And how do we solve it on a global level? Because that's the only way that the earth like the actual earth is going to survive, right?

Speaker 2 (14:43):
Gosh, absolutely. It is a global problem because the Europeans went out and colonized Africa, Asia, and all the other countries. So it is a global problem. Was, is it because we are centering your centric principles? Yes, we are censoring your Cedric principles, all of the, of the wisdom and the knowledge that live in different cultures. We don't have access to because here's the spiritual part of it. That is every culture, something, a piece of the puzzle to make us interdependent. So you need me and I knew I need you, but if I tell you you, that everything you have is less than my year centric dominance, of course, not only do I disrespect you blame a teacher to disrespect yourself. So I think there's a lot of different things happening. First, we have to tell the truth about these, the manifest destiny and with all the European European countries went out and colonized everyone.

Speaker 2 (15:46):
We got to talk the truth because it robs people of the culture, the tradition, the language, the wisdom, and who they were. So now we have to go back and reclaim those parts of us. That will be nice and demonized by the dominant culture. So we don't have to go back and do that piece. The second thing we have to understand that you are centric patriarchy, all sorts associated with art, ethical capitalism. And so we have to understand, we can abuse the environment for money. So now we have a different spiritual issue because again, God makes us stewards of their environment, not rapist of the environment. And capitalists teaches people to weight the environment.

Speaker 2 (16:37):
Again, that's not indigenous that's young centric, a lot of, a lot of indigenous cultures. We said that we were one with their environment. And so now that's your centric. It don't be me has to do is to be careful of this toxic individualism. Again, your centric. If you look at African cultures, native American cultures, native cultures, native, Asian cultures, it was community. We were right, but now you have this real centric, John Wayne, by your bootstraps and individual, this toxic individualism, just me, me, me, me and my mind, mind what happens. Those messages are toxic and it makes us compete against each other versus collaborating with each other. So we got to address those things, colorization, greed, capitalism, and also historic history. So that if our addressing those issues, we continue to have racism and colorism and colonialism and imperialism and all these things that center the centric perspective of the world, which is a very, I'm trying to be nice. It's a very sadistic capitalist selfish type of perspective and this and this global world with all of us to do our global part and understand that we are global citizens, but I am not going to do my part when I feel dominated by you. And so we gotta address the dominant. If you even think about our friendships, you don't want to be a friend with someone and they start making all the rules and change it. I'll change the rules and treating and abusing. You

Speaker 1 (18:31):
Tell you the rules.

Speaker 2 (18:34):
You're not going back into solidarity and that's what's happening. But now it's France, it's nations. And the European nations are the ones telling Africa what to do in Asia, what to do and in Canada, what to do. And the interesting thing about it, many of the nations are getting tired of the Eurocentric for so it's going to be interesting, but those are the things that are are instrumental. They are the imperatives so that we can start changing the ethos without changing the ethos, without changing our consciousness, we will not be, will not have a good society. Society is a reflection of our consciousness.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
Absolutely. And that's why we have the white house right now, right? Yes, I do. I definitely want to talk about consciousness because there are a lot of people who, so, you know, the new term is woke, like stay woke, but a lot of the people who are quote unquote woke or not conscious, right? Not in the way that you're using it or the way that I'm assuming that you're using it. I feel like we, we are kindred spirits and we know we, I know exactly what you're saying. And my question to you is for people who don't understand or people who think they're woke or people who don't even understand or have a have a basis for consciousness, what, what do you mean by that?

Speaker 2 (19:58):
Yeah. What a great question to me, having a consciousness of humanity means that you understand that we all are one entity dependent. What affects me affects you too, that we are interconnected. I've had a piece of a puzzle puzzle. You have a piece of the puzzle and I need your piece and you need my piece. A third thing that that's really important about being, being conscious. Our rock is to have a sense of integrity, meaning that what I want for me, I want for you. So there's no, there's no hierarchy in our humanity. I'm just as human as you are that we have to understand about this consciousness, about being broke is that the collective has to be more important than the individual, especially now when we are decolonize, our thinking and dismantling paradigms that have trapped us into a level of confetti that really has all of us being puppets. And nobody sees that, listen, we all will be in played absolutely the few at the top. And, and until we start being passed in their game, they will pit us against each other so that we can destroy each other. And also they're fighting each other. They have

Speaker 1 (21:20):
Exactly cause they can still rule the world.

Speaker 2 (21:24):
The first thing we have to understand is that consciousness means that I have a purpose. I came to the world with a combination of skills and talents and abilities to make a significant contribution that only I can make to society. So that means that I understand that I am somebody's solution to their problem. And I'm the answer to somebody else's prayer because we have been made to really be each other's support systems. Now, if I am a country and I am raping, you have your resources and I am enslaving you. I have already forfeited the opportunity to be in good relationship with you. And so that's one of the things we got to understand that we're interdependent. We have interconnected, there is an int there's integrity. There has that, that we all are born and made and came into the world to be purposeful, not predictable, which means that we have to honor diversity.

Speaker 2 (22:30):
There needs to understand that we were made to look like a garden with not the same as a ghetto. So there's a whole bunch of different plants and colors and sizes. The ghetto is homogeneity and sameness. So until we realize that we're just different, that you are not a deficient because you're different. I will never honor you. So there's a lot of awakening. And what I see now is a lot of people are saying that their work without knowledge is there without lived experience their wealth without having just a good foundational understanding of life. And that's dangerous because it's like having a surgeon practice medicine without going to medical school.

Speaker 1 (23:18):
Absolutely. And it's almost, it's almost the opposite end of the spectrum from what people of color have already been experiencing. Right? Because you can't be abusive to other people. So to say that your work

Speaker 2 (23:33):
Absolutely. And it's so funny is I hear white. Some white people say, well, we're getting better, but it's like this. Yes. You're you might be hitting me less. That you're still hitting me. It's still abusive.

Speaker 1 (23:47):
Yeah, absolutely. So I'm going to say to any of our white sisters out there, I'm actually, I'm speaking, like let's talk to the 55%. Yeah. Let's talk to the 55% voted for Donald Trump and what message. And we didn't even intend on talking about this today. Right. But what's the message that you feel like they need to get.

Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yes. I think, believe that what women need to understand that always partnering with their whiteness and their gender versus their gender. Well, we'll come back to haunt them because it's going to be a time where there are going to be more people of color.

Speaker 1 (24:40):
Absolutely. It's, it's almost here really?

Speaker 2 (24:42):
Yeah. And, and, and, and sometimes you better hope you don't have to say memory of what you're doing to us. So that's one thing your rightness will not save you to what would understand what I want you to understand that by voting for Trump, you're really not saying a lot about yourself saying that as a white woman, it's okay to laugh at people who are different. It's okay to say that due to cost and say, people come from countries, it's okay to touch people's body parts. So if you are a mother with that guy said to be done to your daughter or your son, if you had a son who was differently, would you write a precedent, making fun of your child, someone as a mother to grab your daughter by the crouch. Do you want as a mother, some one too, to make rules about what she can do with her own body as, as a mother, right?

Speaker 2 (25:48):
Mother, do you want that to, to stop benefiting from a formative action because right. Women for the formative action rather than us. So I, I don't understand the question I want to ask them. Do you hate us so much that you will deny your gender, but also I want to say that why women need to understand that they have a history of the black women. They are the one, the reasons why we don't trust them from the selfish movement until the 1920s black women and white women, we were side by side to get the ability to vote. When the white women got to vote in the 1920s, they forgot about us and the parade they made, the black women get in the back of the parade to the 1920s and then did not help us get to what we have. Right? Let get the vote.

Speaker 2 (26:44):
So why is it we got to vote in 1920s. We got the vote in 1965. So I want white women to understand that you have the power as mothers. We are nurturers. You have kids working, looking up to you and looking at you for guidance. And we have power as women to change men. But if you don't speak up and your humanity and remember what it used to feel like when you were othered will perpetuate the same narcicisstic patriarchal system that will help your daughters. So if you don't want to do for you to do for your daughters and your granddaughters do for your grandsons. And I feel I'm grieved by women who I'm sure talk to me every day in Berlin against every rule that will support me and my family when I would have supported everything to support them in their families.

Speaker 1 (27:44):
Absolutely. Absolutely. All right. So let's, let's shift gears just a little bit. I know you have something dropping tomorrow. Something is happening for you. I want to hear about that. And then I want to hear about how people can work with you if they, if they choose to tomorrow.

Speaker 2 (28:02):
Yes. What's her mama book is coming out, is called deciding to sort to are wrapping your purpose. I am so excited about the book. It, it really talks about that. We all came to the world knowing our purpose, but we get socialized out of our gifts. We get socialized out of that morning. How about how amazing we are? So I share with people that many times we don't do our purpose. Not because we don't know it, but because of outside factors like really cue resistance or the perception of a lack of resources and how to really decolonize your thinking like we were talking about today, and this metal does internal paradigms so that you can take that stuff off and shine and become who you are authentically, where, so that you can be who you were created to be. So it's 70 chapters and it's a book of essays.

Speaker 2 (28:55):
His story's a very short chapters are L Aribel wisdom. Things that I learned growing up, for example, a message like my grandma elders used to say, don't connect with people if they don't know what you carry, which means that you should never connect with people. If they don't understand your brilliance, or if you stay mad too long, you get mean, so things are, they used to tell me stories like just because somebody is raised with you does not mean they will. They will rise with you. How to, how to be gifted in a family who does not recognize your gift. So stories that help people step into their power, their gifting, their noise, their calling, their however you want to call it. And I'm really, really excited and also comes with a reflection guy, because I want people to read the book and to think about how can that lesson apply to my life so I can live more holistically and live in my truth. So that's coming.

Speaker 1 (29:56):
I love that. So look, while you were talking about the book, this is what I'm going to actually do. I have, we haven't even discussed this, but for anybody who actually shares this episode and tags us both on Instagram and Facebook, I'm going to pay for their copy of the book. I'm going to buy the book for them. So we'll, we'll, we'll figure out how to do that. Cause I just thought about it. So you just let me know like let us know when the book comes out, the book is coming. Okay. So we're recording this on November 25th, the book is coming out November 26th. This is going to be released sometime in December. So they can come to your website.

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Yes. Our website and purchase it. Absolutely. They can purchase a, it will be available hard copy and digital copy. And they can buy it from me or Amazon or go, I don't care. I just want people to buy the books wherever they can, wherever the book is available. And if they want to, they can go through the book with me, we're going to, like I said, 70 chapters, we're going to go through the book in a year. And if they want to come into a special Facebook group, we can talk about it. Cause it's all about those, those ways that we need to support ourselves. So we can be the highest and the best version of ourselves.

Speaker 1 (31:09):
So we're going to have the link to the Facebook group in here as well. Now I know that you do private coaching or you coach women. How do, how, excuse me, how can I work with you in that capacity?

Speaker 2 (31:21):
Sure. There are a couple of ways that people can work with me. One one-on-one which makes sense based on whatever a person is going through. But I also have a program that I'm going to start in January called idea to be me. And it's all about how can I activate my courage so I can be who I want to be and who society has taught or told me to be. And how can I change my mind? I work Mia with a lot of doctors who are coming to you after practicing medicine. They're saying, I hate this. So I'm trying to help women to say, it's okay to pivot. It doesn't matter if you went to school 20 years, if you hate something, reinvent yourself. And so I'm really excited about that.

Speaker 1 (32:04):
Oh, awesome. Awesome. Awesome. So I want to get the links to all of that so we can make sure it's in the show notes for everyone. Is there anything else that you want to talk about today or any parting words that you have for the listeners? Yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:17):
I want to leave this message that really resonated with me. Somebody told me years ago, it's always better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for who you are not. And so I want to encourage women to be okay if you hate it for who you are, if you are being authentic. If you're being honest, if you're following your truth, it's okay to be hated because the biggest price we pay as women is the price of regret. Never want any woman to feel an experience regret because they did not have the courage or the clarity to deal with rejection and resistance. So let people hate you. If you are being honest about who you are, because I feel bad pleasing will take your power and will make you live a miserable life. So it's better to be hated for who you are and then to be loved for who you are. Not yourself. That's important.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
Love that. Love that. Thank you so much for coming.

Speaker 2 (33:22):
Thank you so much. I'm so grateful for you. Thanks so much for sharing your platform with me.

Speaker 1 (33:27):
Absolutely, absolutely. And enjoy your holidays.

Speaker 2 (33:30):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 1 (33:33):
Okay guys, that's it for this edition of brand disruptors. Oh my God. This was so juicy. I hope that you guys are listening, sharing. Like I said, you share this with both antagonists, both. I will pay for your copy of her book. So let's do it like let's share the love. Let's let's make sure that she gets a lot of love for this book and I'm like, let's just do this.